In some parts of the world today, physical ugliness has almost totally disappeared.
In some affluent Western societies a child could grow up never having seen anyone with any kind of extraordinary feature such as a large nose or even sticky out ears. Fairly low-level disfigurements such as facial warts or acne scarring are also now on the decrease. Unless you live in an underdeveloped country you could go your whole life without ever seeing serious ugliness in the flesh. This must be, on the whole, to the good. But does it condition us into only seeing the superficial? I worry that if society as a whole elevates youth and beauty to the highest height we are in danger of becoming ageist and shallow. Or perhaps I should say MORE ageist and shallow since this trend is already well under way.
One would think that today, when a girl can earn her own living and need never resort to the patronage of of a husband to support her, her appearance would be less of a concern. As we know, this is not the case. Beyond having healthy skin and hair women still want to look as attractive as possible. Only nowadays we declare that we are doing it for ourselves (because we are worth it!)
I am old enough, and confident enough to recognise that my main reason for trying to improve my appearance is for the sake of others and how they may regard me. If I were the last person left on earth I would not care about how I looked. My looks are important to me, but I have established where I draw the line. For example I will splash out occasionally on a very expensive item of clothing which I believe flatters my shape but I will not go as far as liposuction or breast enhancement, even though both procedures would probably flatter my shape more than a well cut dress. These are personal decisions and if you have never thought about just how important your looks are to you and where you draw your own line, then it is time that you did.
A woman I once knew was so concerned about her looks that she would not answer the door unless she had her make up on, in fact she did not even like her husband to see her without her makeup. At night she removed her makeup and then retired to bed in the dark and rising before her husband awoke in the morning she would appear at the breakfast table looking as she always did – beautiful. She will be much older now and although we have lost touch, I daresay her routine is very much the same - but perhaps takes a little longer to accomplish, lol!
If you are truly indifferent to the way you look then spending time in front of the mirror or visiting the beauty parlour may be considered a total waste of time. If your appearance is very important to you, but you don’t have the time or money to devote to your looks, you may feel very frustrated and unhappy. Beauty (being defined as each one of us looking our very very best) can be achieved on fairly small sums of money, but ALWAYS needs a certain amount of time. Your first step is to determine your priorities, how important your looks are to you and how far you are prepared to go to maintain them.
We each have natural features that we consider to be nice, and equally, features that we dislike. Look at yourself in the mirror and decide which are yours. Write them down in two lists. This is mine from a little while ago to give you an idea of what I mean:
Features I like: Nice Big Green Eyes with long lashes. Good cheekbones. Full lips. Very long hair. No split ends.
Features I don’t like: Grey streaked hair. Wild fuzzy hair. Small forehead. Acne scarred skin. Large pores.
I know that someone who has written on her list that she doesn’t like her tiny eyes with short stubby lashes will envy me my nice big green eyes with long lashes. Likewise if she has rich auburn hair that gently curls on her list I will be turning green. Whatever features you have put on your list you can be sure someone is envious of you. This is putting your appearance into perspective.
Be honest with the list, don’t worry you can rip it up when you are finished, you don’t have to keep it or show it to anyone, although it can be interesting to look back at it from time to time (this list is already out of date for me and writing this is a reminder that I should do it again).
The list will give you an insight into what features you want people to notice and which you would prefer that they didn’t. It will also give you a starting point for improving those features that you really dislike. For example, I listed my grey streaked hair as the first of my features that I dislike. I really dislike the grey colour so I decided to do something about it. I accepted the fact that I did not wish to use commercial dyes because my hair is too fragile to cope with the damage that they cause, so I began to investigate natural plant dyes. Using the plant dyes takes several hours but it was important to me and so I made the time to do it. I also made extra time both morning and night to apply conditioning oils to my hair – this has helped with calming down the fuzziness. Of course it is not perfect and it needs daily attention but it is natural, long (a feature that is important to me) and if I have a special event to attend it will take styling with heat and using gels etc… without falling out and without too much damage or breakage – provided I don’t do it too often!
I decided that I couldn’t do much about my small forehead – although changing hairstyle can do wonders for changing the appearance of your face – it turned out that I wasn’t so concerned about it as I was the greyness of my hair or the condition of my skin, so I concentrated next on my large pores. A daily wash with Rhassoul mud has done wonders for improving the texture and tone of my skin along with a weekly hydrating mask for my dry cheeks and neck. If I do nothing else in the way of a beauty regime than concentrating on these two areas, my hair and my open pores, has gone a long way to correcting the features that upset me most about my appearance.
Next you need to promote your good features. If, like me, you like the shape and contour of your eyes then you want people to notice them. If you need to wear glasses you would be best to choose a nice open style that lets everyone see your eyes more clearly, or go for contact lenses if you can wear them. I have recently started to use a little oil on the area around my eyes because I am getting older and I don’t want to compromise what I consider my best feature, but I don’t want to get rid of the little lines that I see forming, I actually like them, they give my eyes expression and character that I think suits me.
I remember an occasion when my husband and I were going to a very fancy ball. I had asked a hairdresser to come to the house to do my hair in a very elaborate style. The hairdresser took ages and ages to get my hair right and although I had showered and put on my underwear I still had to do my makeup and put on my dress. With the taxi driver threatening to leave because he had another booking the hairdresser pinned the last curl in place and I dashed upstairs to put on my make up and my dress. I realised that I wouldn’t have time to do my usual fancy occasion makeup and decided to simply do my eyes. It took me barely two minutes to apply eye shadow, eyeliner and mascara. I finished with a quick sweep of blusher on my cheekbones and then stepped into my dress and shoes. I put my lipstick and lip brush into my purse ready to apply in the car.
I had a brilliant time at the ball and later when I saw the photographs I was very pleased that my makeup looked every bit as good as on the occasions that I had taken half an hour over it. No one would have guessed that I had done it all in record breaking time and I realised that by concentrating on just one or two areas (my hair and my eyes) I had not only saved myself time, I had also drawn everyone’s attention away from my flaws and the areas that I hadn’t had time to fix.
Most of us will already have a skin care and makeup routine that covers normal work days, house days and special events. By doing your list of features you like and dislike you may find that you have been focussing on the right places all along or you could discover that in fact you don’t need to spend so much time on certain things as on others.
In the normal course of events very few of us have time for pampering every day, but once a week becomes more of a possibility with at least once a month being the minimum that you can get away with – dependent upon your own individual circumstances, age, condition etc.
On a daily basis many little beauty jobs can be done while doing other things… a routine manicure, pedicure or face mask while watching tv in the evening for example. Keeping your beauty products all together in a box or basket that can be brought easily into the sitting room means that you can accomplish all sorts of things while engaging in conversation, listening to music or watching the television. However, if you live with someone who harbours illusions about you then you may wish to keep these jobs for the bathroom or for when your partner is out.
…She admitted that there might be some excuse for young girls to curl and frizzle their hair, for they naturally wished to make themselves attractive in the eyes of men – “which was all girls seemed to care about nowadays” – but after marriage no woman should think of using curlers. Girls, she stated, might seclude themselves from sight till the process of crimping and curling was accomplished, but she could not help feeling deep compassion for the man who was obliged to see his wife in all the hideousness of hard-bunched hair. Home Notes, Sept 7, 1895.
Know your Skintype: Normal has an even tone, the pores are usually not visible and there are no flaky or greasy patches. A normal complexion is supple and smooth and glows with inner health. The occasional spot or pimple may appear from time to time depending upon various conditions, puberty, menstruation, illness etc but in general this skintype is not likely to suffer from acne or other skin complaints. As always, you do have to continue to take care of your health (eat and drink healthily and take regular exercise) and follow a suitable skincare routine in order to maintain this skintype.Someone with normal skin can use just about any natural beauty product they like, it will be down to preference and the end result, to choose which ones become part of your regular routine. 
Know your Skintype: Dry is uncomfortable and can be visibly so. With dry skin there is usually a lack of the skin's own natural oils which means the complexion is often flaky or even cracked. It is not simply lack of sebum (the skin's natural oil) that gives this appearance but also lack of moisture/hydration. Dehydration is often the cause of the most obvious symptoms for this skintype. A dry skin will feel taut after washing and is often prone to sensitivities. Wind, sun, central heating (including car heaters) and our computer screens, make dry skin noticeably worse. Illness and some specific medical conditions can cause extreme dry skin and related skin problems such as excema or psoriasis - if you suspect that your health is to blame then do seek professional advice from your doctor or specialist. 
Know your skintype: Oily often looks shiny and greasy with enlarged pores prone to blackheads. The complexion may look sallow or dirty. The skin has a tendency to look coarse and dull. This condition arises generally when there is overproduction of sebum (natural skin oil) and there are times in our life when this is prompted by our hormones. Adolescense is one of these. Oily skin is prone to acne and unsightly blemishes - again this is no stranger to most of us during puberty. However, hormonal imbalances can cause oiliness of the complexion at any age and diet is definitely a contributing factor. People with oily skin needs to deep cleanse more frequently and may find that natural skin peels become a regular and slightly more time consuming part of their routine. On the bright side, those with oily skintypes are often the last to get wrinkles and show the signs of ageing. But this benefit hardly outweighs the drab look that oily skins can often have. 
Anti-Oxidants are things like Vitamin E, rosemary extract and grapefruit seed extract, which prolong the natural shelf life of oils and fats. Their purpose is to interrupt the action of oxygene radicals which damage the integrity and function of various natural substances. They are useful in your product for two reasons. Not only will they help to prevent the natural degradation of the some of the raw ingredients in your formula, they will also help protect skin cells from similar damage, these effects include minimising age spots, imparting radiance to the skin and slowing down the formation of fine lines - so it could be said that they are anti-aging ingredients!
By making your own products YOU make the decision of which preservative to use and how much to put in. For example if you are including a fresh herbal tea or using flower water rather than distilled water you might choose to use a synthetic preservative at a slightly higher percentage than if your product is made with distilled water and includes tea tree essential oil.
Asked if they would like to use parabens in their face cream, most people will say, No.
Parabens has been used as a preservative for decades because of it being extremely effective against a very wide spectrum of bacteria. Actually, nothing else is as good in this respect. Scientifically it is still one of the safest preservatives on the market. You see, not only did they find parabens in that tumour, they also found other things too, from all sorts of foods and cosmetics. And of course, because one tumour does not constitute a viable scientific study - there is no proof that any of the substances found actually caused the unfortunate woman's cancer. I did promise no urban myths here. You will read on other websites that this substance is cancer causing and that you should avoid it... usually by buying whatever product that particular website is selling. The truth is that this is not proven... you can believe what you like... but that's the facts. 
Before I go any further I must add my own personal take on the use of synthetic chemicals as skincare ingredients - I try to avoid them as much as possible, however I believe that a large number of them are safe to use in the correct percentage in products that I occasionally use on my skin and hair. Since when we are in good health our bodies detoxify regularly, I am confident that the small amount of synthetic chemicals that I do use pose no discernable health threat to me... no more so than when I eat non-organic food at a restaurant.What you won't get anywhere on this site is claims that certain skincare ingredients cause cancer or any other health problems. Many such claims you read on the internet have no basis in science and no credible proof anywhere beyond the urban myth.
I believe that it is sensible to cut out unnecessary synthetic chemicals from our lives... as much as possible. However I do not go to crazy lengths... there is no point in cutting off your nose to spite your face. If you live a very 'toxic' lifestyle or perhaps your health is generally not so good...then yes you may wish to cut right down on the use of synthetic stuff. But under normal circumstances with a healthy body there is no reason to believe that a reasonable use of carefully chosen synthetic ingredients (used with knowledge and care) would cause you any harm.
We all have to use a hair wash of some kind right? Or do we? I had suffered with an itchy scalp ever since I could remember. I had always had flakes fall onto my shoulders and I could never wear black tops. I had great difficulty in finding a shampoo or hair wash preparation that would fix this problem without causing me more problems. Gradually over the years I noticed that my hair was thinning and every day I would have to remove stray broken hair strands from my pillow.
IngredientsA large handful of fresh Rosemary
I say this often, but it needs repeating, would you throw a real silk blouse into the washing machine on a very hot wash? NO you would not, so why treat your hair to very hot water and lots of rubbing and squeezing and squashing? Be gentle!!
A natural soap can be a wonderful change from using a detergent based shampoo. Choose a soap that has plenty of rich oils included, preferably a soap bar especially formulated for use as a shampoo. My favourite is a super fatted soap rich in Shea butter and Castor oil. The super fatting means that there is excess oils in the soap that will be released onto the hair or skin when you use it. If your hair is naturally very oily this may not be the best hair wash solution for you but it works a treat on dry hair. A shampoo bar can leave the hair feeling thicker and rougher with less shine - depending upon your hair's natural shine ability. But over time it certainly improves the quality and strength of your hair because it is not stripping the natural oils from your scalp. It won't give you the lustrous finish that many commercial shampoos do because it does not contain any chemicals to coat the hair shaft. 
If you are happy to try a hair wash experience without any bubbles at all you might want to use Rhassoul mud. Rhassoul comes from Morocco and has been used for many generations as a hair wash and skin cleanser. It is simply a matter of wetting the mud pieces (or granules) allowing them to swell and then massaging onto a damp scalp. The mud can then be rinsed out or left for a few minutes to work in the same way as a face pack. I found that it wasn’t necessary to leave it more than a few seconds on my hair for it to do the job well and unlike many other clay formulations it rinses very easily from the hair. Both natural soap and Rhassoul have what is commonly known as the ‘Big Hair Affect’. Leaving the hair feeling and looking much thicker than usual. But like soap it leaves the hair looking a little dull. It is worthwhile experimenting with all of the above to find out what works for you. And once your hair is healthy and strong there is no reason why you can't return to using the occasional bought chemical product for that special look.
What causes Damaged Hair? Well, usually, we do. Poor diet is a major factor in unhealthy hair as well as incorrect brushing, (see the Grooming posts) combing, washing, styling, sun, sea, swimming pools, not to mention shampoos, conditioners, hair dyes, straighteners, perms, gels, waxes and hairsprays all have a big part to play in the daily damage done to our hair. Yep, pretty much everything damages our hair.
Choose your grooming implements with care and do not skimp on cost as far as these are concerned. A good quality brush and comb will last you for years. A wide toothed comb is important for combing out tangles, especially when hair is wet, choose one that is perfectly smooth with no seams or rough edges upon which your hair can catch. If your hair is long or especially thick you will not need any other comb but if you have short or fine hair then choose a smaller toothed comb for fine styling. The comb can be made of anything at all, the most important thing is that it is very very smooth.
If your hair is excessively dry you may wish to try a little natural conditioner at this point. The best natural conditioner is of course the scalps own sebum but sometimes a little help is required.
Epsom salts or more accurately Magnesium Sulphate is the second-most abundant element in human cells and the fourth-most important positively charged ion in the body, so it's little wonder this low-profile mineral is so vital to good health and well being. Magnesium, the major component of Epsom Salts, also helps to regulate the activity of more than 325 enzymes and performs a vital role in orchestrating many bodily functions, from muscle control and electrical impulses to energy production and the elimination of harmful toxins. 
I do not agree with taking the mobile phone into the bathroom, I also do not think you should be able to see a television from the bathtub! A little restful music, or even thought provoking radio will not interrupt or spoil the occasion in any way and adding a beneficial substance to the water can only enhance the experience. 
Among the Victorian guaranteed cures for many ailments was the mustard bath. It worked in a similar way to epsom salts by producing heat and sweat which helps to detoxify the body. Certainly if you are feeling cold and unwell a warm bath can be most welcome, the water need not be too hot, since the mustard draws the blood to the surface of the skin generating heat as it does so.
You may think that the old fashioned once a week bathing routine has gone by the wayside. No, no, no! Well perhaps it has in your house. Nowadays we mostly shower once a day using shower gel or soap and think of a bath as an occasional aid to de-stressing. It is great for de-stressing but should not be left for the occasional pamper session. The once a week bath needs to make a come-back and establish itself firmly into your skincare routine.
Bath salts are considered a little old-fashioned, but like many old-fashioned things - they really do work. 
Bath Oil is very much back in favour due I think to the increase in dry skin - following on from the use of too many soap-detergents like shower gels. It is very easy to make yourself and need not break the bank. Bath Tea This is perhaps the oldest additive you can add to your bath. The choice of herbs and flowers is vast so you are only hindered by your knowledge. Easy to follow instructions to make bath tea coming soon. 
1. LAVENDER Lavendula angustifoliaSuits all skintypes, acne, burns, inflammations, athletes foot, insect bites and stings, sunburn, wounds, depression, headache and stress-related conditions.
Dry Skin Roman Chamomile, Geranium, Lavender, Patchouli, Rose Otto.Oily Skin Cedarwood, Lemon, Ylang Ylang, Lavender.
Aromatherapy Recipes for Normal SkinRoman Chamomile = 1 part